the ears of my ears awake...

I'll admit it; I've been a tad crabby this pre-Thanksgiving season. Yeah it's hard to be away from family, yeah we'd probably rather be eating turkey than chicken, and for those of us from the north, something about 95 degree weather doesn't really put us in the mood. But it has been good for me to see the students be as excited as they are - apparently I need to be reminded that a whole holiday based on gratitude is a pretty incredible thing.

And thus, I begin with a vastly limited version of my list: I have a job I love with continual opportunities to meet and see and learn amazing things. I have a network of family and friends that support me and send me love everyday in all sorts of ways (email, facebook, snail mail, prayers, songs, the list goes on...) and give me a foundation and center in all of my ventures.

I'm also thankful this year to be in a place that reminds me how important it is to pay attention, to work actively to raise awareness and to consciously choose to be truly awake. Attentive to the realities of people in other places, aware of the part we play in it all, awake and celebratory in the beauty with which we are still showered regardless. Whenever I let myself really revel in gratitude for a time 'i thank you God' by e.e. cummings comes to mind. he expresses, in far more beauty than i could hope to, gratitude for and the joy in awakening. happy thanksgiving.

i thank you God

i thank you God for most this amazing
day: for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes

(i who have died am alive again today;
and this is the sun's birthday; this is the birth
day of life and of love and wings; and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)

how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any -- lifted from the no
of all nothing -- human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?

(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)

-- e.e. cummings

escape to the country...

I should have posted last week, upon returning from our rural homestay...but for some reason it has seemed especially difficult to verbalize what it was about the community that so impressed me. In other places we have heard moving presentations about the history of the community, we have seen incredible organization, we have been welcomed into homes.

But this place, this place just felt healing almost. Granted I think we all felt a little trapped in Managua, and who doesn't feel slightly liberated upon leaving the city - but even taking those things into account, this community just struck me as remarkable. I think everyone felt it; students spent late nights talking and dancing with families, afternoons out riding horses, climbing up the center of an old enormous tree, hiking through the mountains, getting to see a little of their fair trade coffee farming and learning how to 'coffee cup' (sort of like wine tasting, for coffee). We all wanted to stay longer and many vowed to return.

What made that place so alluring? I'm still not sure I know but it seems like it's got to be the combination of natural beauty and the genuineness of the people in their interactions with both us and each other. It was certainly a blessing for us to be there.

I'm lucky enough to know that I'll go back in January with a short term delegation of college students and again with the spring semester group. It's much easier to say goodbye when you know you get to return.

released!

well, the streets of managua have settled down and while the 'official' results have not yet been released, the unofficial official results were thrown at the people on wednesday (or was it thursday?...sorry i can't remember) and things have calmed. other cities are still experiencing turmoil, but here in managua we were free to spend the weekend out and about.

and having been released, i very much enjoyed the weekend out of the house. we went out to dance twice and spent saturday with the students on a day trip. we visited an active volcano (we could look into it, but no molten lava...sorry...tory informs me this is not nearly as cool), went to Masaya for lunch and an artisans market (where i purchased jewelry) and then did a group check-in in Granada.
it's been a lazy sunday and i've been putting off work and packing all day. we're headed out to the country for the better part of the week (mon-thurs) and i really should go prep. thank you for all of your prayers and well wishes over the last week - they are greatly appreciated.

continuing unrest...

It's been a few days since the protests/riots started, and it hasn't been non-stop but it has been destructive - seems to calm down at early morning and then start back up late afternoon. I found a few more pictures, and the story has definitely hit the international news so you can easily find information on it online if you're interested. I also added some pics to my last post.

They will supposedly announce the official winner of the election this afternoon - so we're expecting chaos of some sort tonight. Large groups of people are already in the streets ready to react.

As for us - we've been in the house nearly non-stop for four days now. We're going a little stir crazy, but we're safe. Keep praying if you think of it and thank you for the well wishes.

coraje en las calles...

i've been looking at this blank screen all day and while the students are putting off their homework, i've been doing all sorts of my own procrastinating. i want to, and need to write today - but how does one convey the coraje (rage) of an unheard people?

here in managua the municipal elections were held yesterday. people weren't thrilled with the candidates or the political parties and many predicted violence, but it didn't actually start until today when it became fairly certain that some pretty major electoral fraud had taken place.

the president's party claimed the victory early, but the opposing party went out into the streets to protest, to 'defend their vote'. i stood there watching the footage of streets just blocks from our house...of people screaming at each other in the streets, throwing out threats to the opposition, boys breaking apart rocks to throw at the people on the other side, groups destroying 'citizen power' campaign huts, bloody bodies being carted out...and it all seemed so surreal. i just wondered, who would go out into that by choice? but what other choice do they have? in a country where so many don't have anything - don't have food to eat, don't have land to farm, don't have a house for their family - i guess i can see why there's so much rage when they take away one thing they are supposed to have, their vote.

it also made me incredibly grateful for the democratic process in the states. i thought about how upset i was in the 2004 elections, how enormous my feeling of despair was, and at the same time how i still knew that our votes had been counted and that the people had decided. i can't imagine that feeling of despair on top of feeling like the system was completely broken.

today feels heavy and anxious and the air is charged. i feel sad and grateful and unjustly blessed. we're all staying indoors and the house is safe (please don't worry about my safety) but if you think of it, pray for resolution and transparency.

a little reflection on redistribution...

unbelievable that it's election time at home and in a few days (God-willing) we'll finally have an outcome. i certainly haven't had to withstand all of the political ads and bombardment that you've all endured these last few months, but even here the election is a big deal. i think people all over the world are holding their breath to see what happens, to see who we pick, to see if we factor citizens of other countries into our decision.

it's also been interesting to see how 'redistribution' and 'socialism' have become words used to instill fear these last few days. now, i'm certain that you're all aware of my political leanings - and i don't write this to try to sway your vote...although if i could, i'd be thrilled :) no, really though, obama and mccain aside, i want us to ask ourselves why we're so afraid of redistribution? and is it moral or 'christian' to be against it?

in class today our professor showed us 'the champagne glass' - which is an image to help us visualize how concentrated the resources really are. this was the cover of the UN's annual report in 1992, and at the time the richest 20% of the world's population consumed about 80% of the world's resources. sadly, in the last 16 years things haven't gotten better. and being in the middle class, in the united states, i'm undoubtedly, gluttonously, swimming around in the top of that glass.

i guess i just saw this image again today and had a gut reaction to it. i felt convicted by it and, and obligated to share it. i felt obligated to speak out for redistribution as so many are slamming it, to encourage people to look at the facts, and ask some questions. why are we so afraid to share resources? why are we ok with the fact that this just keeps getting more exagerated? why do we continue to put people into power who support this set up?

i'm not always as eloquent as i'd like to be, but i love that you're all willing to listen/read and love it even more when you comment or start conversations with me about it all. i hope that my questions come through as just that - questions, and not condemnations. and i hope that they always come through with love.

bienvenidos a nicaragua...

well, new month, new country. last week we arrived in managua, nicaragua, our third, and final home city.

we had last week off for vacation so i got a chance to travel around and explore nicaragua a bit before programming starts. i saw some amazing things and really fell in love with a few places; but after getting to see the last two countries the way i did - narrated with peoples' personal stories and drenched in the context of their history and politics - i felt somehow like my feet weren't on the ground. i'm ancy to start learning the story of this place.

in the meantime, i'll include a few visuals of my week off. the first is a pic of the first island i visited, home of two volcanoes and the monkeys seen in the pic (first time i've ever seen monkeys in the wild and there was a baby!) and the picture of the cathedral is from granada.